ADHD Masking and Golden from K-Pop Demon Hunters: From “Problem Child” to Shining Unapologetically

By Kanjana Hartshorne, LCSW, C-IAYT, CCFP, Reiki Master

What if a K-pop movie song could capture the whole ADHD journey—from feeling alone to glowing unapologetically? That’s what Golden from K-Pop Demon Hunters does. It’s not just a banger—it’s a mental health anthem for anyone who’s ever masked, felt misunderstood, or lived a double life.

(And yes, KPDH is my latest hyperfixation. 

What Is ADHD Masking? The “Two Lives” Experience

“I lived two lives, tried to play both sides / But I couldn’t find my own place.”

ADHD masking is the act of hiding your natural traits—your energy, creativity, distractibility, or stimming—to appear more “acceptable” in school, work, or relationships. For many, it feels like living two lives: the authentic self and the “performed” version.

While masking can help people survive in environments that don’t understand ADHD, it often comes at a cost: exhaustion, disconnection from self, and a sense of being invisible.

From “Problem Child” to Power

“Called a problem child ‘cause I got too wild / But now that’s how I’m getting paid.”

Many kids with ADHD are labeled as “too disruptive,” “too much,” or “problem children.” What’s striking about this lyric is the flip: the very traits that were punished in childhood become the source of artistry, creativity, and even livelihood in adulthood.

It’s a reminder that ADHD isn’t a flaw. It’s a neurotype. And often a super power. What gets pathologized in one setting can be golden brilliance waiting for the right stage.

Breaking the Walls of Shame

“Waited so long to break these walls down / To wake up and feel like me.”

The relief of unmasking is profound. After years of self-silencing, there’s freedom in finally living authentically. The walls of shame and self-doubt begin to fall, revealing a truer, brighter self—“shining like I’m born to be.”

This captures what therapy for ADHD often aims to do: help clients step out from behind the mask and into their full selves.

From Ghost to Golden

“I was a ghost, I was alone… Now I believe.”

The journey from ghost to golden mirrors the ADHD experience: from feeling invisible and misunderstood to finding community and empowerment. And importantly, Golden frames this transformation not as a solitary fight but as a collective anthem—“together we’re glowing.” 

Healing ADHD shame and unmasking is often easier when you find a community that gets it—people who don’t just tolerate your quirks but resonate with them. The lyric “together we’re glowing” captures the heart of this truth: when ADHDers and other neurodivergent folks gather, what once felt like weakness turns into shared power.

Why This Matters

Golden isn’t just a song—it’s an ADHD story. It reminds us that while masking may help us survive, unmasking helps us live. When we stop apologizing for who we are, we don’t just exist—we shine.

ADHD Therapy and Assessments at Healing Hearts Wellness

At Healing Hearts Wellness, we know ADHD is not an “excuse.” It’s a different way of experiencing the world—one that deserves understanding, respect, and support.

Our therapists help adults:

• Slowly unmask in safe and supportive ways

   

• Challenge internalized ableism and shame

   

• Embrace their creativity, quirks, stims, and “too much-ness” as strengths

   

We also offer adult ADHD assessments (21+), which are especially valuable if you’ve wondered whether ADHD has been missed or misdiagnosed as:

• Anxiety

   

• Depression

   

• Autism

   

• Bipolar disorder

   

• OCD

   

• Panic disorder

   

We believe self-diagnosis is valid and that sometimes having an official diagnosis brings deep relief, clarity, and access to resources.

You don’t have to keep living a double life. You deserve to feel seen, supported, and celebrated for exactly who you are.